"Nooooooooo!"

An impromptu post about news I've just heard: Disney has bought Lucasfilm and all its subsidiaries (Industrial Light and Magic as well as Skywalker Sound). I felt a tremor in the force when I read that (and listened to the accompanying announcement video). It turned into an "Alderaan has blown up" moment, when I read the following lines from the announcement: "Fans can expect a new feature film, Star Wars - Episode 7, in theatres worldwide in 2015". Oh, Obi-Wan, no...

If there were ever any doubt that Lucas sold his soul, here's the proof.

I love the original Star Wars trilogy. They were an adventure, and a moral guide for me growing up, something that made me aspire. Okay it made me aspire to become a Jedi Knight, but there are worst things to dream of as a kid. In fact I'd even say one of the greatest things I learnt about storytelling came from those films; start in the middle of something. I read a huge amount of the spin off books, and in fact still have them all sitting on my book shelf behind me. I played the games (even the bad ones) and thought no game would ever be better than Knights of the Old Republic. I was, and still am in some ways, a die-hard Star Wars fan, with a cacophony of useless information about the extended universe in my head. In other words, a total geek.


Then the prequels came out. I wanted to love them, I truly did. But I couldn't. A combination of personal maturity and life experience, combined with the dull story elements, meant I've never been able to take to them the same way. But they are part of the canon, so I accept them. Even if I'd like to rewrite them to get rid of some of that clunky dialogue, and cringe worthy "romance" moments. And a certain Gungan who shall remain nameless. But I thought that would be it. My Star Wars geekdom could be satisfied with the Blu-ray versions of Episodes 4 to 6, the Clone Wars cartoons, comic books and the odd new novel, when they write about something half original (note: I have not bought a single Star Wars novel in over six years. Make of that what you will.)

Because I'm an eternal optimist I'm going to hope they don't screw up with the seventh episode, though they will inevitably fuck up the chronology established in the books. Not a big deal to most, as I doubt many people have read a single one of them. I like X-Men, I can deal with there being an 'Alternate Universe' for the books. But fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice... I'll not outright say a seventh film will suck. Fan-made shorts have proved how good a Star Wars feature could be, and if Disney can get close to this I'll be happy:

Then, as though this old Jedi/Pirate wannabe hadn't been tortured enough, I got to this part: "Disney plan to release a new Star Wars feature film every two to three years for the foreseeable future." So not only did Lucas sell Yoda into slavery to the Vodaphone masters, now the franchise as a whole is going to be squeezed for every dime, until it turns into a husk of its former self. How very Empire like.

I think it may be time for the fans to form a Rebel Alliance. Who's with me?